"The Music Industry Solution"

Script of the video presentation by Joel Kaminer

Hi Everybody, it's Joel Kaminer coming at you today from Marc Ribler's personal throne. You know the guy who wrote the condom song, "This Life"? I've been hearing that these big rich rock head bands like uh radiomophead. or uh, radio, uh radioshack, that band you know Radioshackhead, they're givin' their music away, doing this advanced promotional...name your price...like giving it away...you pay whatever you want, but I know if someone tells me I can pay whatever I want, I'm not gonna want to pay that much.

I want to tell you about a new business venture. Marc Ribler, first of all, has made me his personal advisor, I'm the president of his fan club, I help him purchase real estate. We just bought a shack out in the backwoods of Georgia and stuff. I shit you not.

In fact, all the kids in Sodie Pop Shoppes have been e-mailing Marc. He's gotten thousands of e-mails and they're saying how much they love that song and they can't wait to get that song and I think they'd pay for it.

[from Marc's studio, listening to video on computer] Here's Marc Song, "This Life"..you just click on the link and there's the song right there. I love this song, listening to that song. My favorite part right here.

[Singing along]"It's the perfect chance to get it right"

Yeah, I love that. What a purty song, I just love that song.

I've got this great promotional idea. I shit you not!

What we're talking about here is $49.99 dollars per CD. What do think about that? Then we have the family value pack for just $89.99, your sister's cousin, you're daddy's cousins, all the relatives get their own CD of Marc Ribler's music. What do you think about that? Now that's a damn good offer.

And if you order now, as an extra special treat, we're going to send you an order of Ribler's Ribs, with the secret family sauce, send overnight to you, fedEx, Express Mail. Sure am tasty.

Now as a very special part of this offer, you know them gurls love them rock stars. The crazy gurls, always trying to pull on Marc Ribler's G-string..you know what they say, "Ribler for her Pleasure".

So I'm saying the ladies get it for free! I shit you not!

The first 500 people, a full crotch poster of Marc Ribler, about yea big [Arms outstretched]. Well, it ain't actually that big.

They been keeping 1000 condoms in a vault since the day that condom commercial was made. The first thousand people each one will get a condom. Ribler for her pleasure!

All you do is you go to www.marcribler.com, press on a link, you go to the Marc Ribler.com page and you click on this link right here [showing web page] and it brings you to the page where you can purchase the CD. It's as simple as that.

And that will down load an SOS file, I mean a PDF file, you just fill out the document, thats all there is to it..just click, click, click on that button for $49.99 for one CD.

All we need is two major credit cards, your social security number, your current address, your past two current addresses, your Mamma's maiden name, your Daddy's license number, your cousin's sister's social security number. $49.99 is the best deal in the universe!

So get right on over to your computer, 'cause if you act now, you get the $49.99 CD, you get the $89.99 family value pack, the first 500 gonna get the FedEx Freeze dried Ribler Ribs with the special sauce, and the first 1000 gonna get the full crotch poster autographed by Marc Ribler himself. Ribler for her pleasure. And the first 1000 folks get an original condom from the TV ad. Now where you gonna find a deal like that in this music industry? Not on TV.

So folks, I just want to leave you with these three last thoughts. Number one, don't forget to go out every day and kiss a musician. Number two, don't forget about a high fiber diet. And number three, love everybody. God bless each and every one of ya. Now have a great day.

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